REPETITIVE NIGHTMARE:

FIRST NIGHTMARE

I’m in a prestation. 

The pre-station is dark, but I know it is a forest.

The air is glassy and there is dust/dust in it

There is grass beneath me, but it is more of something green that I know is grass, but as if made in VR. 

I feel that I am being watched. 

At one point I hear a sound – rustling – from my left. 

I feel fear.

I hear a second rustling – from the right.

Later in front of me.

I turn around and start running.

Again I hear rustling in front of me (behind me looking from the beginning of the dream). 

I stop.

SECOND NIGHTMARE

I’m in a prestation. 

The pre-station is dark, but I know it is a forest.

The air is glassy and there is dust/dust in it

There is grass beneath me, but it is more of something green that I know is grass, but as if made in VR. 

I feel that I am being watched. 

At one point I hear a sound – rustling – from my left. 

I feel fear.

I hear a second rustling – from the right.

Later in front of me.

I turn around and start running.

Again I hear rustling in front of me (behind me looking from the beginning of the dream). 

I stop.

In the distance stands a wild boar is facing me with its muzzle (its trunk is on the left side of its muzzle looking from my perspective).

It is strong, dark brown in color.

He has a penetrating gaze. 

He is not looking at me, but I know he is watching me.

It turns its head toward me and moves toward me.

I run away, getting lost in the woods.

THIRD NIGHTMARE

I am a prestation. 

The pre-station is dark, but I know it is a forest.

The air is glassy and there is dust/dust in it

There is grass beneath me, but it is more of something green that I know is grass, but as if made in VR. 

I feel that I am being watched. 

At one point I hear a sound – rustling – from my left. 

I feel fear.

I hear a second rustling – from the right.

Later in front of me.

I turn around and start running.

Again I hear rustling in front of me (behind me looking from the beginning of the dream). 

I stop.

In the distance stands a wild boar is facing me with its muzzle (its trunk is on the left side of its muzzle looking from my perspective).

It is strong, dark brown in color.

He has a penetrating gaze. 

He is not looking at me, but I know he is watching me.

It turns its head toward me and moves toward me.

I run away, getting lost in the woods.

I find a tree. The tree is brown and devoid of leaves.

I climb the tree. I think I will be safe, but the wild boar also climbs behind me.

I see that it has three piglets.

The boar moves behind me into the crown of the tree, but the varmints stay on the trunk.

I flee to the left to another branch, then hide behind another branch.

Finally, the boar moves away.

I feel relieved.

Nothing in this world is completely realistic, it’s more like VR, and the boar seems cut out of a movie.

FOURTH NIGHTMARE

The boar’s muzzle appears and rises, and a human skeleton appears to me.

The skeleton is like from VR.

It is luminous.

It comes closer to me and shows me the right side of my spine in the lumbar region.

I am afraid of it, but at the same time I am fascinated by it.

The skeleton is Satan, who seduces me.

The spine is fluorescent – greenish.

I wake up.

POSSIBLE READING

My inner middle, about my spine, core spine. What is my trunk? Where is it? 

 

As a secondary dreamer, I am lost, I am very emotional, I cannot a way, I can’t go to one direction, I cannot make a decision, because everything around me is very open. I cannot see very clearly what is around me. I need time to recognise this and at first, I feel, even if I cannot see it, I feel it. Then I hear something, I follow signs. I am going further and further, follow some outside signs. I am calmer every time when I am further and I see more and feel more, because I know more. Even after this I can have a plan for something, for the next step. 

Then I meet, not only with the boar but also with a tree, this is a part of me. It is my safe place. And I can explore it and be safe there and go in different directions and see more from different view. Now I am lost in the branches. Because I thought this is my safe place, but also, I see the boar is showing me different directions and says to me: Look at me, look at me, look inside. And I do not want to look to this and see what is there. And then I see what is inside. I am not afraid anymore. Even if it is not very comfortable, I am not afraid, even if it is a lot of light, green light, green light. I sympathise with this, I want to see it, I somehow feel like in that moment, I am looking to my inner middle.

How do I come out from behind the branches, land on the ground, and take the strength of my trunk, lower, near my pelvis, and stand in my power?

 

As a secondary dreamer of this dream, I feel there is the VR quality for me as a form of distancing from the essence of life and of being embodied. Maybe it is also a way I am sensing in this world. Something new in a different way, yet there is a distancing quality from being really in the body. I have four parts to this dream, so there is a certain amount of structure that I am navigating here and three is a number of perspective, and there is a perspective in this dream and movement, where I have made it to the plan, and I have a plan, and my plan though, I am still feeling myself in the branches of the tree and I am still hiding, I feel like I have tricked the strength part of me in a way, but maybe it tricked me? So this is a question. Is that also something that is happening here, this play of the strength. Because I am the boar as well, I am the beast, is the beast part of me which is closer to the ground, something that… it has piglets, it is growing, and the skeleton, this even darker place. I see the skeleton, the neon, fluorescent green, it is still making it a little artificial to me, it is not real, I haven’t put the pigment into the green so that it becomes real. I am distancing myself from something. And I feel that I have still sympathy with this part of myself, even the strength of it, and so as a secondary dreamer, I find it interesting that I see the right side of the lumbar spine, liver and spleen, this right side of my body, I have not gone all the way to the left side, and I know that there is a lot going left and right, the right side of the spine, the lower part of the spine which is also like the ground of the spine, is telling me how to really take the strength of my trunk, and stand in my body and get off the tree and stand in my strength. And this is how I dream this dream.

How can I embody myself?

 

My strength, my health, my physicality to be in the place of my alignment with the fascination and the danger of it? Because there is a greatness within me and there is a challenge, accepting and living the greatness. There is a tendency right now in the dream, it is very airy, thinking, certain density to the space I am in and at the same time it lacks details. Like VR, it is the space of phantasy. And I am moving through this space of phantasy to feeling something, but not really feeling it deeply it in the body. There is the boar part of me, still a little disembodied, because it is a recording, a stereo, that I don’t find the connection yet to. It is all VR, lack of embodiment, I kind of feel it, but the dream is trying to bring me to sense it fully, to live it fully with my body. My habitual way of reacting to this potential, there is adrenaline, yet when I face the potential, I freeze. And then I run away. I wanna face, but there is a habit of running away and hiding, and going high onto the tree, which is like going into my mind, and not really stepping down into the physicality of my body. But I cannot run away and hide. Because each time the dream is showing me that the energy is coming towards me, and this energy wants to be met. This energy first I see it on the right side, and I face it. For me this fear is connected to the right side, which is the male aspect of myself, of that full on, as the dreamer describes it, full on, muscular, masculine, taking its space being. And yet the energy of it keeps moving and growing, there are the three piglets, something to focus on, as three is the number of perspective and the number of focuses. It stays on the trunk, wants me to come lower, to my middle, and to my emotions, because it is so much about what I feel, what I don’t feel and how I react in this dream. The three piglets are there, this new energy is there connected through the three, and I feel the skeleton is like the devil, the one who seduces, the aspect, which is extremely creative and extremely powerful, and at the same time because it is the skeleton, it is there, pure light, in the dream I move towards the darkness, the dissolution of shape, and then the light. And for me green is so much about light and life. For now, it is neon and dark, calling for attention. But there is something calling for support, holding the will power and emotionality. I am shown this place to tap into, the place that I cannot escape from, I can feel sympathy to it, because it me. I need to learn to live this light, and there is something about the green at the bottom. It is the grounding. The green of the eyes, in the boar. There is something about the way of seeing the world, the standing in the world and the way of aligning and supporting myself in my life, in my body, being in my body, and daring to be there. This is how I dream the dream.

ADDRESSING THE NECESSITY OF THE DREAM:

After the introduction. I am standing in a clearing. I am skinny and have yellowish skin. My right shoulder is obviously higher. I have scarred loins that I can’t wash well with the sun’s rays. They put up resistance. And the washing is sometimes unpleasant. I see a boar. I approach him. Its eyes are calmer. I am afraid but I approach. I touch his fur. It is soft. The boar bites me on the right. Fluid comes out of its teeth/mouth, filling me up and making me feel bigger and stronger. It touches my penis with its hoof, which gets incredibly long and finally flies away. The boar sits up and turns golden. It digs with its hoof in the ground as if it is about to move, but gold appears in the place of the digging. I extract a bar of gold, which is soft. I rub myself with this soft gold. The loins are resisting again. But it makes me feel good. It calms me down. I take more of the golden ointment from the earth and lubricate myself with it. The source in the earth is inexhaustible. The gold flows in the earth, like blood vessels. I lubricate myself all over. I feel and look strong and brave and embedded in the earth.